Let it be publicly known that I, Linda Simpson, disapprove of the following cultural developments:
*Comic character Archie is being killed in an upcoming issue, when he stops a bullet meant for his gay friend Kevin.
Gee whiz, what ever happened to comics being lighthearted? I used to love the Archie series as a kid, but how can I ever appreciate them again with this tragic gay twist? Bad publicity stunt!
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*Lawmakers want to crack down on Times Square’s costumed characters, because some of them are supposedly bothering tourists.
Yes, we get it, leaving infants in hot, suffocating cars is a bad thing. Not good. Now go report on some real news!